I remember attending a virtual international church meeting on zoom in 2020 or thereabout where I saw one “Victory” among the participants doing some serious troubleshooting for technical issues. I automatically assumed it was a guy because for the most part, it’s guys that do such things. I was really impressed to find out later in the meeting that this Victory was a lady. Somehow I took a mental note of it.
I found out much later that she’s one of the sisters who is based abroad whose parents happen to be friends with mine although we had never met.
Fast forward to July of 2021, daddy Kola and mommy Remi Adegoke started LET’S GIST; a program designed for mentoring and coaching of youths to prepare them for marriage and a productive kingdom oriented life. Victory and I had the privilege of being brought on board to be coordinators and administrators on the program.
At this time I had been praying and looking for a life partner. Someone with certain qualities and someone with whom I will partner to fulfill God’s purpose. So I knew that God’s choice for me on this matter was the best. On the 19th of April 2022, I received a call from a mutual friend (of Victory and I) who is based in the US.
He called to ask about my well-being and to ask me about my plans in general. Knowing him to be someone who cared about my well being and progress, and based on how the conversation was going, I assumed this was a call to encourage me to consider relocating to the US where better opportunities abound for me career-wise. I’ve also known him to suggest this to other people. I was quite surprised however when he began to talk about marriage because we had never discussed the issue of marriage before. I was even more surprised when he got specific and asked me what I thought of Victory. For you to know how faint my knowledge of her was, it took me some minutes to even figure out who he was talking about.
All interactions between Victory and I at this time (which were very minimal) were strictly based on the administration of the “Let’s Gist”. So I had never seen her in that light. He then began to tell me about her great character traits and how God-fearing she is. Honestly while he was talking, I was really not interested because I didn’t believe in “match-making” and he wouldn’t be the first to suggest someone to me. But apart from the fact that he said he had a leading from God in this direction, he started catching my attention when he began to tell me about the role she plays in the youth ministry over there in the Atlanta fellowship. That caught my attention, because youth ministry is something I have a passion for and a calling in amongst other things. So, I knew that the person I would marry would be someone who would either share the same vision or ultimately be able to support me in it so we can fulfill God’s purpose together. I told him I would consider it.
He was mature and gracious enough to tell me to prayerfully consider it and get my own conviction. And he never talked to me about it again until much later when I brought it up. After that call, I went online. A brief scroll through her instagram page revealed 2 things;
1. She’s fine and has a good fashion sense;
2. She loves Jesus.
Because of how much I have prayed about this marriage matter, I asked the Lord to just let me know whether this is someone I should be praying about or not. I honestly didn’t have the energy to start engaging in long fasts and prayers for this like before. But from that night, the Lord began to give me impressions in my heart concerning her. So I became more intentional about mentioning her in prayer, and the more I did, the more light and clarity I had about it.
While praying about it though, I became interested in knowing her more, but I was looking for how to randomly start off a conversation with her. As God would have it, on my birthday she wished my twin sister (who is her friend) a happy birthday and somehow (for the first time) decided to wish me, her brother same. I saw my opportunity!! And I took hold of it. And we started having friendly chats from there.
Thankfully Let’s Gist also began to pick up more around that time, so I took advantage of our Let’s Gist administration work to keep sliding into her DMs 😉.In about 7 months, I had enough spiritual conviction to confirm to me that she was the one. Honestly within the first 2 months of praying about her God gave me most of the confirmations that I received about her without even sweating it out too much in prayer. From random conversations with God to random conversations with my parents who knew nothing about my interest in her, and other simple things like that. It’s like I was just being bombarded with confirmations left, right and center. But I still wanted to give it time to be very sure. I also wanted to take time to know her for myself. And my interactions with her all through this period made me see for myself that she is really a woman of great character and virtue. I saw alignment in our values and pursuits. And gradually, I started falling in love with her.
By November of 2022, I was very convinced that this is the lady I would like to marry. So I eventually told my parents and this our mutual friend who both advised me to build a good friendship with her first before making my intentions known. This was wise counsel and it was very important because at that time, even though she would still flow with conversations that I brought up while we chatted on WhatsApp, I was the one doing most of the reaching out. So though we were chatting every now and then, that “vibe” between us was just not there. At some point, I started thinking of what to do to get her attention and make her know that I wanted to take our friendship to a deeper level, because so far, I was the one doing all the work in keeping communication going.
I found out that her birthday was coming up in January 2023, so I felt that a birthday gift from a guy all the way in Nigeria would get her attention. So, I liaised with this our mutual friend on how to go about this. So after about a week or 2 of scheming and planning, I eventually ordered a box of cupcakes and had it delivered to her doorstep on her birthday. I was eagerly waiting to see her reaction to my well thought out gift, and hopefully through this, “strike oil”💪🏽. But the one line “thank you” message with a smiling emoji I got after literally getting my friend to call her to open it, sank me into depression faster than I had ever gone in my life. Not that I was expecting her to be all over me because I sent a gift, but I assumed that such an unexpected gift would evoke more appreciation than that and more importantly, pass across “the message”. Of course, also considering the dollar-naira exchange rates 👀. But for what I wanted to achieve, I felt that the sacrifice was definitely worth it. So this made me to start rethinking the whole thing and I started wondering if I was making a mistake.
So I began to withdraw from her a bit for some days to afford me time to rethink and pray more about my intentions towards her. I needed to be sure if I heard God well. Because I felt that if she didn’t appreciate what I did, then trying to foster a relationship with her might be a waste of time seeing that she may not be interested. My withdrawal was also a test. Because of how frequently I reached out to her, If she noticed my absence, then it was a sign that she could be interested, but if she didn’t, then it would just confirm to me that I was wasting my time. I believe that no matter how much word you receive, if the lady is not interested, then you guys are not going anywhere. And if there’s no positive vibe (green light) on her end, then there would be no encouragement or confidence to come and talk about marriage.
But funny enough in my time of withdrawal from her and prayer, God still reassured me that she’s the one and that I shouldn’t go anywhere else. So I decided to continue chasing her like Christ chased His bride (we His church) whether we were giving Him positive vibes or not. However, she must have noticed my withdrawal and unenthusiastic responses to an ongoing discussion we were having that weekend about Let’s Gist related issues. Because to my greatest surprise, for the first time, she chatted me up out of the blues on her own on the 6th of February 2023 (the next week), just to check up on me. I can’t forget that day. When I saw her message, I couldn’t focus on the meeting I was having at work again. This was unusual but very encouraging. From that day, she became a lot more open, responsive, and interested in our conversations, even leading them a lot of the time. I said “God, I don’t know what you did, but whatever you did is definitely working and I like it”.
We graduated from long unending chats to exchange of long voice notes (trust me, VERY LONG voice notes. I don’t think WhatsApp knew that their voice note feature could be used the way we used it). And from there, to audio and video calls. All this happened within the space of a month and a half (February to mid-March 2023). By this time, we had bonded in such a way that we had not bonded all through the year 2022. We had covered so much in our conversations for me to realize that we shared similar views on so many important topics and that we had similar values. Most of all, I enjoyed her company more than that of anyone else.
This level of friendship was exactly what I had been trying to achieve all this while, even with the cake thing. So with the assurance of Divine backing, the go ahead of my parents and some mentors, my heart full of love and her recent positive vibes, I had the confidence to make my intentions known to her on the 14th of March 2023 on a video call. Thankfully, she gave me her “YES” on the 19th of March 2023 and our courtship officially started. She visited Nigeria the next month to “attend a wedding ” that was taking place in Abuja. But who were we kidding? The real intention was for us to meet, because prior to this, we had not met physically. That visit was phenomenal and every moment we shared was magical.
On the 4th of May 2023, I arranged for a surprise proposal with some friends when we went to take professional pictures at a studio. And relationship has been a wonderful experience ever since. It has been an interesting journey. We have also gone through more than words can capture — seasons of tears, pain, waiting, disappointments, and what looked like setbacks. Yet, through it all, there is nothing more precious than the confident peace and rest of knowing we are walking in the perfect will of God, and there’s nothing sweeter than the gift of love. A love so natural and seamless, it feels as though our hearts were handcrafted to belong to each other.
Victory is the best decision I have made in my life; only second to Christ, and I would choose her a million times over.My heart is full of joy and gratitude. Much more than my mouth can say. I’m glad we’re finally here. After everything, Urim finally gets the Victory 💪🏽✌🏽 🎉
Let me take you back a little bit to the year 2021 when I first met Urim. Urim and I met when we were both added as admin for Let’s Gist platform, which was created as a group for young adults by Uncle Kola and Aunty Remi Adegoke. Through it we started to connect but strictly on a platonic basis and only to coordinate what needed to be posted on Let’s Gist to create engagement.
I noticed however in October 2022 that Urim became more intentional about reaching out to me and finding out how I’m doing outside of coordinating for Let’s Gist. However, late that year, I was occupied with the thought of someone else and there also seemed to be some other people in the picture at the time. As you know, sometimes during the time the right person is about to come forth, there are others that arise. So as a result, I was preoccupied and my focus was not on Urim at the time.
Then in December we had our first call over the phone which he wanted to have and it went well, but still no spark, partly because his profile picture also wasn’t the best at that time and I didn’t know him. I hadn’t seen him before so that was my first impression. Then I travelled for vacation for my birthday in January of 2023 only for me to come home and receive a call from our mutual friend asking if I received a package.
I saw that I received a package by my door and opened it, only to see cupcakes and a card from Urim. He had found a bakery in another state in the US and sent it to my house. I was shocked. I sent him a short thank you message, with the mind to send him a little longer one later. But since I was traveling the very next day for a wedding, I didn’t have chance cause I needed to repack my suitcase to head out immediately. So I forgot, only to be reminded that I didn’t complete the text message when he responded to it the next day, and by that time I felt it was too late. I told my parents about it, my friends, and my mom who was so excited. I on the other hand, was still unsure. I wasn’t sure if I would like Urim in a romantic way, and at the time someone had caught my eye because of dreams I thought I had received. I have a history of God speaking to me through dreams so it confused me.
However, when I came back from my trip at the end of January, I decided to let go of whatever I thought I received or whatever I was thinking and surrender it to God. By now it was the beginning of February, and I started to notice Urim withdrawing and not being as conversational as before. So I decided to reach out and get to know him. After all, it couldn’t hurt, and I knew he was a very intentional person. If he was being this consistent, then maybe there was a reason. So I reached out to him on February 6th and we kept talking. We talked every day and I started to like him and then fall in love. Our values aligned and when I saw him in a random video he sent me on February 25th, I knew his profile picture did not do him justice. He was so handsome! By the end of February we were doing voice notes, and calls, we then started doing video calls beginning of March. Then on March 14 he called me on video call and made his intentions known that he wanted a relationship that would lead to marriage.
I thought my confirmations would come in a vision or dream but it came simply with the word of God and instruction from the Holy Spirit. One thing Urim told me was to look for the supernatural not the spectacular. With that in mind I realized my confirmations didn’t need to be over the top to be able to give an answer. So with that in mind, I gave him my answer on March 19th and we began.
My heart is at rest and I have found the one my soul loves. The Lord wrote this love story. I trusted him to write my love story since I was 9 years old and he has led heart to the right hands. Urim is my first and only love and I’m grateful to God for how he brought us together. Together we will fulfill destiny!
